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The Key Mindfulness Habit To End Drama In Your Life

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minfulness habit end drama

All of us have some drama in our life, even if it is only internal. In this article you will learn a mindfulness habit that can radically reduce internal and external drama and suffering. You will see results quicker if you practice this powerful habit often. The opposite of drama is peace. So, as your experience of drama decreases you will have proportionately more peace in your life.

Here is the key principal: There are things that happen, and then there is our reaction to them. Although most of the time our reactions are automatic, they really don’t have to be. Everyone has had some experience with non-reactivity. It may even occur by accident. For example, imagine you fell in love with someone a week ago and you are feeling on top of the world. Your mood is such, that things that would normally bother you have little or no effect. Your boss could reprimand you, or someone might cut you off in traffic; events that normally would elicit an internal reaction of feeling tense and exasperated don’t bother you.

Maybe you are familiar with the old technique of counting to ten before responding in a situation that makes you angry. This technique is similar to that but it is a little more sophisticated and much more effective.

 

minfulness habit end drama

 

Skillfully utilizing this technique begins with the intention to become more mindfully aware of the experiences that might set you off. And, having this awareness the moment these events happen; right as they enter our senses. The point is to catch them right at that moment. Our senses, in this case, are six: Sight, hearing, smell, taste, touch and thinking. We are including thinking in the senses just for this exercise. It doesn’t matter if it is not normally considered one. Everything we experience enters our consciousness through one of these means.

Begin Practicing Paying Attention To The Senses.

This means being more mindful of things as they happen before you attach a story or opinion to them. Next, in the moment the event happens you will catch it with one of your senses and label it as Pleasant, Unpleasant, or Neutral. You can use the acronym P.U.N as a reminder. Again, it’s important that you do this only as the sense(s) perceives it with no story added; it’s just the sensory experience.

Here’s an example: Imagine you are sitting in a park reading something on a peaceful spring day. Suddenly you hear a whooshing sound as the sprinklers come on and begin to soak you and your book! Okay, so in your normal mode you might be fuming, thinking; great, now I’m soaked, my book is ruined, and my hair… Now you are in a bad mood that can color the rest of your day. It is not uncommon to turn little inconveniences like this into catastrophes, at least mentally.

Let’s stop here and rewind the mental movie and slow it down to catch what happened at the senses. As the sprinkler turned on, your hearing picked up a whooshing sound, next you felt water on your skin. That’s it! So far there’s no mental story; no drama or suffering.

Next, check in with your breathing and drop your attention into your body. Just watch the breath for a few seconds, and feel into your body. This does several things: It diverts your attention away from creating a story (drama). It also calms down the nervous system and provides oxygen to your entire body and brain – This feels good. And, this reinforces the wholesome habit of having your attention focused on the body in the present moment, rather than getting carried away in the head which likes to time-travel to the future or the past.

So, now after a minute or so, you are now calm, centered, and feeling okay. You are in a much better place to respond skillfully; perhaps you walk out of the sprinklers for instance with a smile.

 

minfulness habit end drama

 

Learning to apply this technique to the sense of thinking is a little trickier, but can be done and it works the same way. You are merely treating thoughts as objects in awareness. Practice is key.

You can easily remember this technique with the steps; A – B – C – D.

  1. Awareness of the intention to practice this.
  2. Be mindful at the senses – PUN is Pleasant, Unpleasant, or Neutral.
  3. Check in with your breathing.
  4. Drop into your body.

Have fun with this and try it a few times today. You will be pleasantly surprised at how you can gain much more choice in how you respond to life. You will also have less drama and more peace.

I hope that you enjoyed and benefited from this article.

Be well.

Brad

 

Brad Maybury teaches mindfulness practices, helping clients connect more deeply with their body and gain greater calm, vitality, and wellness! Those with symptoms of anxiety, stress and trauma go from surviving to thriving.

You can get more mindfulness tips and resources in his newsletter, plus a free copy of his book by visiting his site: http://www.traumarecoveryresources.com/newsletter

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6 Reasons Why You Should Create A Bucket List

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Reasons Why You Should Create A Bucket List

The term ‘bucket list’ has become quite popular in recent years. It has been used in pop culture references and as a casual topic of conversation when someone wants to do something. Chances are, you have heard someone say, “Oh, that’s on my bucket list!” But, a bucket list is more than just a fantasy, an out of reach dream or an excuse to say that you want to do many things, only to never follow through on them.

There are actually many benefits to creating a bucket list, if you just put in the time, the thought and the dedication into it. Making a bucket list is a perfect way to set your life goals and to stay focused on making them a reality. Still not 100% convinced? Let’s take a look at six reasons why you really should create a bucket list. Maybe, by the end of this article, you will be ready to put together one of your very own.

1. It Gives You a Purpose

While putting together a bucket list won’t tell you what the meaning of your life is, it can help to give you a purpose to your life. A bucket list should be more about the major goals that you have for yourself, rather than a bunch of fun little things that you might want to do. A bucket list gives you something to get out of life and allows you to stay focused while you are doing it.

Have you ever been bored, wondering what you’re going to do this weekend to fill up your free time? A bucket list can give you that answer, encouraging you to always work towards the things that you truly want to do and experience in life.

2. It Brings Your Goals to Life

As stated above, a bucket list should be about exciting goals that you have for yourself. But, it is also an opportunity to hone in on those goals. Many people have ambitions and even make goals or resolutions for themselves each year only to be forgotten a few days later. But, when you have a specific list of goals written down, it can help to make you more motivated and focused to achieve them.

Goals are incredibly important to have, and the fact that your bucket list can make those goals clearer and more tangible is really important.

3. You Will Create Lasting Memories

Memories are one of life’s greatest treasures. As you start to accomplish the things on your bucket list, you will also be making wonderful memories each time. Since you are doing the things you really want to do, those memories will bring you comfort, a sense of achievement and give you something positive to look back on and share with others.

Bucket list Create Lasting Memories

4. It Will Pull You Forward

Have you ever been in a “funk” in life, or maybe you have had bouts of feeling down or depressed that have kept you from doing the things you typically enjoy? No one wants to stay in that kind of mindset for long. Because a bucket list can help to give you a sense of purpose, it can also give you the motivation to pull yourself out of a funk. It can call you to do something new, something different, or something that even challenges you. Sometimes, that’s all a person needs to be pulled out of a tired or depressed state.

Additionally, doing something on your bucket list will help to distract you for a while. That can be a great solution for someone who has anxiety or tends to focus too much on the negative things in life. Sometimes, a distraction can be a welcomed reprieve.

5. You Will Experience Life-Long Learning

When you commit yourself to having new experiences, you are also committing yourself to learning something new. So many people think that learning stops when you finish school, but you can learn so much more simply by living and trying more new things throughout your life. People who embrace this type of lifestyle are called “lifelong learners”. The reality is this; you will never be able to learn everything there is to know. But, because all of us have such a short time on this planet to figure things out, the more experiences we participate in, the more that we will learn and grow. Not only can a bucket list help you to learn things about different cultures, skills, situations, people and personalities.

It can also help you to learn more about yourself. Closing your mind off to the idea of lifelong learning will cause you to become stagnant with your thoughts and your growth. As a human being, you should have a desire to continue to grow and achieve as much as you possibly can throughout your life. Working through your bucket list can help you to achieve that.

Bucket List For Life long Learning

6. You Will Never Run Out of Things to Do

If you sit down to make a bucket list, you might write down anywhere from 10-100 things that you really want to do. But, it doesn’t have to stop there. Chances are, as you start to work through some of the things on your list, you will come up with more ideas.

Experiencing new things, and even challenging things, is a great way to get inspired and motivated to continue on that trend. A bucket list can truly be never-ending as you come up with more exciting new ideas and goals for yourself.

Building Your Bucket List and Bettering Your Life

There are so many additional reasons why you should create a bucket list for yourself. Remember, a bucket list is a very personal thing, and the experiences you put on the list should be things that you truly want to do or accomplish. Don’t make them  so unrealistic that you will never plan on committing to. Instead, promise yourself that you will immerse yourself in those experiences.

A bucket list might be something you create to accomplish things before you pass on, but in creating one and diving into new experiences, there is a good chance you will feel more alive than ever!

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8 Ways to Take Care of Yourself Every Day

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8 Ways to Take Care of Yourself Every Day

Self-care is a term that gets thrown around a lot lately, to the point where it’s easy to ignore or blow it off as some kind of “buzz word”. But, it’s so much more than that, and when you are willing to take self-care seriously, you might just start to see how much easier it will be to get through each day. (more…)

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The Top 8 Most Important Things in Life

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The Top 8 Most Important Things in Life

It is easy for people to speculate and debate about the most important things in life. You have probably heard that “the best things in life are free” or that “love is all you need”, but what about what are the most important? What do you really need in this life in order to find contentment and fulfillment? (more…)

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