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5 Steps to Being Treated the Way You Deserve

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Do you feel like you deserve to be treated better? That is because you do. Whether it is with colleagues, family, friends, or intimate relationships. We all deserve the very best. The key is making sure we are treating ourselves that way. This is a journey worth taking. We dictate how others will treat us. Here are five steps to get treated the way you deserve:

1. Make a List of All the Ways You Feel Wronged

Be honest with yourself; this is not the time to be polite. This is the time to go deep and get it all out. Here are just a few questions to help get you going:
➢ How were you treated?
➢ How did it make you feel?
➢ What patterns do you see in the way people treat you?
➢ Who has mistreated you verbally, with actions, or inaction’s?
➢ Where are you most mistreated (home, work, intimate relationships, friendships)?

2. Reverse the List Back to You

With every answer ask yourself where and how have you treated yourself this way:
➢ How have you mistreated yourself through actions, inaction’s, and self-talk? Where do you mistreat yourself in your relationships at home, work, intimate relationships, and/or friendships?
➢ How does mistreating yourself make you feel?
What you will find is that nobody can treat you worse than you treat yourself. Our energies don’t allow it. We are all mirrors of each other and when we react with emotions to someone else’s behaviors, we have something to investigate within us. Seeing ourselves clearly is the best way to eliminate pain from other people’s actions or inaction’s.

3. Make Time for Self-Care

meditation

We must put our personal care first. This is how our focus stays on track and makes it possible to help others effectively without mistreating ourselves. We all have our own journeys. Self-care is taking the reigns on your road. If you are over on someone else’s path, who is focusing on yours? When we take care of ourselves it is easier to see people who truly need our help and people who are avoiding doing their own work. Find what form of self-care you are connected to and do it. Find a way to put it into your daily routine; be creative. Here are a few suggestions:
Reading: Listen or read books that help you in the areas you are struggling.
Writing: Start a journal, write a blog, or just write to write. Develop your craft by taking the time to learn more about what you like to write about.
Weights: Lift if it is what makes you feel better. Everything weighs something, if you don’t have money there is no excuse; lift tinned cans, jugs or a chair.
Cardio: Go outside and explore. Look-up the parks and reserves in your area and get out there. If you prefer using a machine, go do it.
Meditation: You will be amazed if you go on-line. You can find a meditation for anything you are looking to improve. If you struggle with meditation, start simple. Three long deep breaths, even if the only time you can find is in the bathroom. Three long deep breaths throughout the day will make a big difference.

We make time for what is important to us. Think about how many times you have found time when you think someone else needs you. Wake-up call, you need you! People will never treat you better, if you don’t treat you better. The most important part of self-care is to stop beating yourself up! Doing too much for others, while not taking care of you is self-abuse. Be kind to yourself. If you can’t look in the mirror and see the beautiful person you are, no one else will either. Give yourself a chance. You are worth it!

Posting affirmations on your bathroom or closet mirror is a great way to get the ball rolling. Make sure to switch them up and read them.
Start a journal and list three things you love about yourself every day; it will get easier.
Keep yourself surrounded with way you want to see yourself. There are tons of resources on-line, such as videos, audiobooks, websites, images, and blogs. Look where you are now, you have already taken the first step.
Be creative! Make a collage, find words in magazines that describe the way you want to feel about yourself. You can make box or jar. Every day write a note to yourself of what you did that day to get there.
Talk to yourself in a loving way. Remember you are human just like the rest of us. There is no room for perfect here. We are all just doing the best we can with the tools we have been given. The key is learning from our mistakes, so that we can stop repeating them.
Take your power back! No one can make you feel anything. You can choose to feel different when you are ready to. Try to look at the events around you from different perspectives. This is a practice in questioning our thinking. It helps to open your mind to possibilities and helps to get us out of victim thinking. As this becomes a natural process, you will reach new levels of compassion for yourself and others.

4. Give From a Loving Place

You will be amazed how naturally this step comes once you start doing the previous steps. When you treat yourself the way you deserve to be treated, natural boundaries start to establish themselves through the energy you put out there. If a boundary feels forced it means there is still some inner work to do. Ask yourself:
➢ Am I doing too much?
➢ Is what I am doing feel forced?
➢ Do I have guilt surrounding what I’m doing?
➢ Why?

Our thoughts and behaviors aren’t affected by other people’s actions when we our secure in ourselves. Our intentions are clear; we can help, walk away, or state our peace without anger. May someone else’s feelings get hurt? Yes, but that is their business and their journey. Will our feelings get hurt? Yes, and that gives us a great opportunity to see situations from different perspectives. We are not responsible for other people’s feelings. We can simply do our best, be true from a loving place, and give to others with love. If we have the love inside, we can give and receive love clearly and without limitations. We don’t expect things in return. We don’t feel depleted and used. When we give from a loving place our energy doesn’t run out. Your body and mind tell you if you are pushing yourself beyond what is best for you; listen.

5. Acknowledge Your Progress

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Nobody is perfect and this process takes time. When you start the self-care journey you will see layers come off. It does not happen all at once. Honestly, we couldn’t handle that. Trust the process and acknowledge what you have achieved so far. A journal can help you document your progress, and it will also help you on your bad days to see how far you have come. There are three forms of progress you will see consistently:
Awareness: Noticing a need for change. Make sure to give yourself credit when you see it.
Acceptance: After we have peeled the layer of awareness back. We understand our part in how people are treating us.
Action: We get to say: I’m ready to do something about it!

Remember to get the support you need during this process. If you are not starting with a healthy support system, look for on-line resources to help guide you to stay strong. Listen to other people’s journeys and get ideas from people who have already succeeded in establishing healthy lifestyles. If the process is too much to do on your own, seek professional assistance. The more you love yourself, the more love, guidance, and support you will feel. Life will provide you with all kinds of lessons to show you how far you have come. Trust the journey!

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6 Reasons Why You Should Create A Bucket List

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Reasons Why You Should Create A Bucket List

The term ‘bucket list’ has become quite popular in recent years. It has been used in pop culture references and as a casual topic of conversation when someone wants to do something. Chances are, you have heard someone say, “Oh, that’s on my bucket list!” But, a bucket list is more than just a fantasy, an out of reach dream or an excuse to say that you want to do many things, only to never follow through on them.

There are actually many benefits to creating a bucket list, if you just put in the time, the thought and the dedication into it. Making a bucket list is a perfect way to set your life goals and to stay focused on making them a reality. Still not 100% convinced? Let’s take a look at six reasons why you really should create a bucket list. Maybe, by the end of this article, you will be ready to put together one of your very own.

1. It Gives You a Purpose

While putting together a bucket list won’t tell you what the meaning of your life is, it can help to give you a purpose to your life. A bucket list should be more about the major goals that you have for yourself, rather than a bunch of fun little things that you might want to do. A bucket list gives you something to get out of life and allows you to stay focused while you are doing it.

Have you ever been bored, wondering what you’re going to do this weekend to fill up your free time? A bucket list can give you that answer, encouraging you to always work towards the things that you truly want to do and experience in life.

2. It Brings Your Goals to Life

As stated above, a bucket list should be about exciting goals that you have for yourself. But, it is also an opportunity to hone in on those goals. Many people have ambitions and even make goals or resolutions for themselves each year only to be forgotten a few days later. But, when you have a specific list of goals written down, it can help to make you more motivated and focused to achieve them.

Goals are incredibly important to have, and the fact that your bucket list can make those goals clearer and more tangible is really important.

3. You Will Create Lasting Memories

Memories are one of life’s greatest treasures. As you start to accomplish the things on your bucket list, you will also be making wonderful memories each time. Since you are doing the things you really want to do, those memories will bring you comfort, a sense of achievement and give you something positive to look back on and share with others.

Bucket list Create Lasting Memories

4. It Will Pull You Forward

Have you ever been in a “funk” in life, or maybe you have had bouts of feeling down or depressed that have kept you from doing the things you typically enjoy? No one wants to stay in that kind of mindset for long. Because a bucket list can help to give you a sense of purpose, it can also give you the motivation to pull yourself out of a funk. It can call you to do something new, something different, or something that even challenges you. Sometimes, that’s all a person needs to be pulled out of a tired or depressed state.

Additionally, doing something on your bucket list will help to distract you for a while. That can be a great solution for someone who has anxiety or tends to focus too much on the negative things in life. Sometimes, a distraction can be a welcomed reprieve.

5. You Will Experience Life-Long Learning

When you commit yourself to having new experiences, you are also committing yourself to learning something new. So many people think that learning stops when you finish school, but you can learn so much more simply by living and trying more new things throughout your life. People who embrace this type of lifestyle are called “lifelong learners”. The reality is this; you will never be able to learn everything there is to know. But, because all of us have such a short time on this planet to figure things out, the more experiences we participate in, the more that we will learn and grow. Not only can a bucket list help you to learn things about different cultures, skills, situations, people and personalities.

It can also help you to learn more about yourself. Closing your mind off to the idea of lifelong learning will cause you to become stagnant with your thoughts and your growth. As a human being, you should have a desire to continue to grow and achieve as much as you possibly can throughout your life. Working through your bucket list can help you to achieve that.

Bucket List For Life long Learning

6. You Will Never Run Out of Things to Do

If you sit down to make a bucket list, you might write down anywhere from 10-100 things that you really want to do. But, it doesn’t have to stop there. Chances are, as you start to work through some of the things on your list, you will come up with more ideas.

Experiencing new things, and even challenging things, is a great way to get inspired and motivated to continue on that trend. A bucket list can truly be never-ending as you come up with more exciting new ideas and goals for yourself.

Building Your Bucket List and Bettering Your Life

There are so many additional reasons why you should create a bucket list for yourself. Remember, a bucket list is a very personal thing, and the experiences you put on the list should be things that you truly want to do or accomplish. Don’t make them  so unrealistic that you will never plan on committing to. Instead, promise yourself that you will immerse yourself in those experiences.

A bucket list might be something you create to accomplish things before you pass on, but in creating one and diving into new experiences, there is a good chance you will feel more alive than ever!

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8 Ways to Take Care of Yourself Every Day

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8 Ways to Take Care of Yourself Every Day

Self-care is a term that gets thrown around a lot lately, to the point where it’s easy to ignore or blow it off as some kind of “buzz word”. But, it’s so much more than that, and when you are willing to take self-care seriously, you might just start to see how much easier it will be to get through each day. (more…)

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The Top 8 Most Important Things in Life

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The Top 8 Most Important Things in Life

It is easy for people to speculate and debate about the most important things in life. You have probably heard that “the best things in life are free” or that “love is all you need”, but what about what are the most important? What do you really need in this life in order to find contentment and fulfillment? (more…)

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