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18 Things To Let Go Of In 2018

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18 Things To Let Go Of In 2018

With the New Year fast approaching sometimes comes thoughts of making New Year’s resolutions. Whether you make a resolution every year or not, they are not always that easy to keep. In fact, many of us end up ‘giving up’ on the resolutions that we planned by the time Spring time comes around.

So, as we get closer to 2018, why not take a different approach to a resolution? Instead of giving yourself a lofty goal that might seem a bit overwhelming at times, think of the things that you can let go of. Letting go of certain things from your life can make a major positive difference in how you feel. Plus, because you are just getting rid of several small things, it is less likely that you will feel overwhelmed, or as though your goals are impossible to achieve.

Let’s take a look at 18 things that you should let go of in 2018. Throw out as many of these negative or weighty aspects of your life as possible, and you could end up having your best year yet!

1. Negative Self-Talk

Before you start letting go of the things surrounding you, you have to look at yourself. Let this be the year where you lift yourself up, and stop putting yourself down. Rid negative self-talk from your vocabulary, and you will be sure to start feeling more confident and positive about yourself.

2. Negative Friends

After you look at yourself, take a look at your close inner circle. Are any of your friends bringing you down, or holding you back in some way? Sometimes, we do not realize the negative impact those closest to us can have on our well-being. It can be a hard decision to make, but sometimes it is necessary to purge the negative relationships from your life.

3. Spending Money

Money is a necessary evil, and everyone seems to want more and to spend even more than they have. Make this the year where you stop spending money excessively. It can be a struggle at first, but by creating a solid spending plan, and cutting out any impulsive purchases will make it much easier. By the end of the year, you will be surprised at just how much money you may have saved!

4. Overindulging

We live in a world where it is easy to say ‘I deserve this.’ While it is okay to treat yourself once in awhile, let go of overindulging on things like food, alcohol, or even big expenses. You will feel better, look better, and you will have more confidence in your willpower in the future.

5. The Past

It is not always easy to ‘forgive and forget.’ But, holding onto negativity from the past can really drag down your present and future. Do your best to let go of anything bad that may have happened to you in the past, and start with a clean slate.

6. Over Scheduling

As a society, we seem to be busier than ever. It is easy to want to cram as much as possible into your days. This year, try to clear up your schedule so that you can have more time for yourself and the things that you enjoy to do.

7. Always Saying “Yes”

People-pleasing can be a huge problem for some people. It is one thing to want to make others happy. That’s normal, and compassionate. But, when you continuously go out of your way to please others, even if it’s at your own expense, you can sometimes be get taken advantage of. Choose what you say ‘yes’ to carefully. Don’t let your mouth overload your back.

8. Taking It Personally

It can be easy to hear something someone says and take immediate offense. Whether a comment is directed at you or not, try not to take everything so personally. When you are able to do that, you will feel a weight lifted off your shoulders.

9. Social Media Impact

It is not easy to let go of social media altogether. But, try getting rid of its overall importance in your life. Let it take a back seat to real experiences, and real interactions with the people around you.

10. Technology

Letting go of technology, as a whole might be impossible. But, like social media, it shouldn’t take over your life. Make a conscious effort to spend more time without watching TV or having your cell phone glued to your hand, even if you have to put your phone out of reach and keep your TV switched off for longer periods of time. When you lessen your dependency on technology, you will be able to experience so much more going on around you.

11. Comparing

Don’t compare yourself to other people. No matter how much confidence you have, you will always find something that won’t quite ‘measure up.’ It’s not worth your time or effort. Instead just try to be the very best version of yourself.

12. Saying “I Can’t”

This is different from negative self-talk: It is a matter of talking yourself out of doing things. Be open to new experiences and possibilities and don’t let feelings of “I can’t” get in the way of the many things that you can do this year.

13. Letting Others Make Your Choices

Sometimes, it is easy to let others walk all over us. Let this be the year where you take control of your life and make more of your own decisions, big and small. By making your own choices you will build your confidence as you do so, even through the triumphs and the occasional struggle.

14. Making Excuses

If you need to get things done, get them done. If you need to go somewhere, go there. Stop making excuses for yourself, and focus on individual goals and tasks. You can complete them without excuses getting in your way.

15. Gossiping

Talking about others will never make you feel better about yourself. And, you could lose good friends in the process. Stop the gossip and negative chatter from your conversations.

16. Putting Fear in Control

Kick your fears to the curb this year! Take more chances and take control by diminishing the fears that have paralyzed you from doing what you want to do in the past. Make 2018 the year that you really start to believe in yourself!

17. Procrastination

You will likely find that by letting go of some things like technology, social media, etc., will make it much easier for you to get rid of procrastination and putting things off that need to get done. 2018 is the year to just do it!

18. Putting Down Others

Like gossiping, putting down others will not make you feel better about yourself. In fact, you will likely feel much better about yourself when you stop doing it.

Don’t limit yourself to just this list alone – This is a ‘starter pack’ to make 2018 your best year ever. Take a look at your life, and consider the things you could let go of that will benefit you and take action.

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Are You Working For A Tyrant Boss? (And what you can do about it)

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Are You Working For A Tyrant Boss? (And what you can do about it)

Multiple studies have indicated that a large percentage of people are unhappy with their jobs. Research carried out by Microsoft in 2021, showed that 41% of the workforce are considering leaving their employer. Sometimes, this dissatisfaction comes from working long hours. Other times, it is about not making enough money.

On occasion, however, the source of unhappiness is the person that you work for. Working for a tyrant boss is draining and stressful. It can have a negative impact on nearly every area of your life, because the stress that it causes makes it hard to “let go” of your workday even when you are at home.

So, how do you know if you are working for a tyrant boss? And if you are, what can you do about it?

A Boss That Is Never Wrong

You have heard of the phrase “the customer is always right,” but do you work for someone who never seems to think that you are ever right?

A tyrant in the workplace is often a dictator. This means that they don’t listen to anyone else’s opinion or ideas, and if they do, they are instantly shut down. A tyrant boss can “never be wrong,” and they have the final authority on everything.

Unfortunately, they are often the ones who will suffer in the end. No one is perfect, no matter how much your boss thinks that they are. If they do not take other people’s input into consideration, they are going to burn out and end up making poor choices, which will impact the business in the long run.

Help people reach their full potential, catch them doing something right. Ken Blanchard

They Expect Carbon Copies Of Themselves

Does your boss seem to gravitate toward employees who are just like them?

Narcissistic people tend to be kinder to those who have the same characteristics. The problem with that? It takes a diverse group of people with different skill sets to make a great team.

If your boss favors people just like them and expects everyone to conform to certain unreasonable expectations, you should see this as a huge red flag.

Additionally, pay attention to how your boss’ personality changes around certain people. If they tend to play favorites, it might be another sign that they are running a tyrannical operation. Everyone in a business should be treated equally. Favoritism doesn’t belong in a professional setting.

Coming together is a beginning, staying together is progress, and working together is a success. Henry Ford

They Don’t Respect Your Work-Life Balance

Work-life balance has become an important topic of conversation over the last year. With more people working remotely, it has been harder for some to strike a healthy balance between their work life and their home life.

While, in many cases, you can find ways to manage this balance, some bosses simply won’t allow it.

For example, does your boss frequently call you on your day off? Do they email you or message you after working hours, or first thing in the morning?

If your boss cannot respect that you have a life and that you deserve some free time, they are running their business like a dictatorship. Good employers know how important it is for their employees to have free time, whether it is for self-care or socialization. When a worker constantly feels like they are “on the clock,” they are more likely to get burnt out quickly, and their performance will suffer.

They Are Master Micro-Managers

Does your boss lurk over you more often than not? Do you find it hard to get anything done in a day because they are micromanaging everything that you do?

Micro-managers want a play-by-play of everything that you are doing throughout the day. They will try to take charge of your projects and overlook everything so you can’t be as productive as you could be.

You can work to diffuse a micro-managing boss by giving them more information than they ask for. Beat them at their own game by giving them detailed information about what you are working on. If they feel like they are not able to be “on top” of you anymore, they will likely give up and let you work in peace.

Great things in business are never done by one person; they’re done by a team of people. Steve Jobs

They Want All Of The Credit

Typically, when a business sees any kind of success, it is a good sign of a strong, dynamic team. One person cannot hold up an entire company on their own.

But, if your boss tends to take the credit for everything and loves being in the spotlight, it can often feel like your efforts are unnoticed and unappreciated. There are children’s books about people doing all the work and someone else taking all of the credit. Some adults just never seem to learn the “moral of the story”.

What Can You Do About It?

So, what can you do if you are working for a tyrant boss? Aside from resigning, which is sometimes the only option, there are a few ways that you can manage things on a daily basis.

First, try not to let your boss’ behavior affect you. Yes, they can be frustrating. They will get to you, at times. It is important for you to take the high road and be the bigger person. No matter where you work, everything that you do is a reflection of who you are – your personal brand. Don’t give in to your frustrations, and don’t fuel your boss’ attitude by snapping back at them. If you do, chances are, their behaviors will become even more exaggerated.

Your overall well-being should be your top priority. If you don’t see any signs of a changing environment, you don’t need to stay in a toxic workplace. Understand some of these signs, and trust your gut when it comes to how you should respond. Many of us have had bad experiences with tyrant bosses in the past, I know I have. In my experience, tyrant bosses very rarely change. They have either moved on or I have.

Life is too short to be stressed out by your boss. Thankfully there are plenty of great bosses out there too who will respect and value you and they are a real joy to work with.

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How To Stop Comparing Yourself To Others

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How To Stop Comparing Yourself To Others

We live in a world where other people’s triumphs, successes, and even their vanity are constantly in our faces. Digital influencers and social media make it seem easy to look perfect and feel amazing all of the time. Even your friends and family members might appear to having more success, happiness and fun.

If you stop to think about it, you can probably list off a handful of people you have compared yourself to in the past last week. Maybe a co-worker got a promotion at work, or maybe your friend has just flown off on vacation. Maybe someone you have not seen in years posted a photo online that made you envious of their lifestyle. When you start comparing yourself to others, it is easy to lose your sense of self-esteem and self-worth. If you let your guard down, you can fall into the trap of chasing after other people’s lives and not appreciating who you are and what you have achieved.

Theodore Roosevelt famously said, “comparison is the thief of joy”. How true those words remain today – perhaps even more so!

How can you stop the endless scrolling, or looking at the lives of people you know and feeling like you’re somehow less important?

Let’s look at a few tips and techniques that can help you to stop comparing yourself to others.

Know Your Triggers

Maybe a co-worker getting a promotion doesn’t affect you, but a friend getting married does. You might be single or recently divorced. Or, maybe you have been in a relationship for a while but your partner doesn’t want to get married. As a result, you start comparing yourself and the things you want to what someone else has. The things that cause you to compare are your “triggers”. Sometimes, you might not care whether someone has more than you, but other times it can really sting and make you feel low.

Understanding your triggers and accepting them will make it easier to stop making those comparisons. First, you can avoid triggers as much as possible until they do not impact you as much. Maybe cut down on your social media usage. Do you pick up your phone out of habit and constantly refresh your Instagram feed? Perhaps get into the habit of keeping your phone out of reach and taking a social media fast from time to time. As you work on that, try to think about why comparing yourself in those specific situations is a waste of time. Once you convince yourself that it is “no big deal,” you are less likely to be triggered.

Remind Yourself That It May Not Be Real

Because of the social media-saturated world that we live in, it is easy for everyone to make their lives seem better than they are. No one is going to post a photo that doesn’t paint them in a positive light. Even in the real world, everything is not always what it seems. Your friend getting married? Maybe they are struggling with something else, like a health condition or money troubles. That co-worker that seems to get all the credit? Maybe they are going through relationship issues at home.

Most of the time, you will only see what people want you to see. You never really know what is going on beneath the surface and behind closed doors. So, when you start comparing yourself to someone else, pause for a moment and remind yourself that no one’s life is perfect. You don’t know what other people are going through, and you may actually be doing better than they are in other areas of life.

Practice Gratitude

When you compare yourself to others, you lose sight of everything you have and everything you can do. Practicing gratitude each day is a great way to stop making comparisons. Think of at least five things you are grateful for every morning to start your day on a positive note.

Alternatively, carry a small notebook around with you and write down something that you are thankful for every time you think of it throughout the day. The best part about this method is being able to look back on your gratitude moments, especially if you are feeling down. It serves as a wonderful reminder of the wonderful things in your life.

Use it as a Motivational Tool

Sometimes, comparison can be a healthy thing. If the thing that you “want” is something that you can work towards, you can let your comparison motivate you to get it. For example, if someone in your life is incredibly kind and charitable, why let their generosity make you feel less important? You do not have to be extremely wealthy to give back. Try volunteering, or donate what you can. If someone at work seems to be getting all the glory, use that as a motivational tool to work harder and get your achievements noticed too.

When you start to work toward the things that make you admire others, it becomes less about comparison and more about who you really want to be. When done “correctly,” comparison can actually push you to be the best possible version of yourself.

So, don’t waste anymore time scrolling through social media and wishing for a different life. Don’t feel sorry for yourself because you think you will never have as much. When you use comparison in a negative way, it will make you feel negative and envious. Instead of comparing yourself to others, let certain people inspire you to do more, be more and achieve more.

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5 Ways To Know Your Self Worth

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5 Ways To Know Your Self Worth

Focusing on your sense of “self” is very important in so many different ways. When you think about it, you are probably surrounded by the word “self” each day more than you realize. From self-care, self-esteem and self-belief to self-confidence, self-respect and self-worth, people are constantly trying to find ways to better themselves in different areas of their lives.

If you ask most people if they know their self-worth, they will probably be quick to say yes. But, if you took that question further and asked them how they know it, you will likely be met with some hesitation. The reality is, most people think they know about self-worth, but do not fully understand what it is or how it differs from other areas of “self”.

So, how can you truly know your self-worth? What can you do to increase it? What are your strengths, gifts and abilities? Let’s take a look at a few ways to have a better understanding of what really is your self-worth.

1. Don’t Judge Your Own Emotions

You can boost your sense of self-worth by accepting your thoughts and feelings. You might not always like them, and you might find yourself at odds with them from time to time. But, whatever thoughts and emotions come into your head, let them in. Then, you can work through them effectively. Emotions demand to be felt. It is how you respond to them that matters. Don’t ignore them and limit your true value. Embrace the wonderful unique person who you are.

 

Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy.Robert Tew

 

2. Question Your “Shoulds”

When you think about the things you “should” do, it might leave you feeling unmotivated and overwhelmed. For example, if you say to yourself, “I should go for a run this evening,” and then you don’t end up doing it, how do you think you will feel? Chances are, you will struggle with some level of guilt. This can snowball into not feeling good about yourself and questioning how much that you value yourself and your self-worth.

Instead, fill your life with things that you “will” do. The word “will” implies that it is more of a promise and a commitment, rather than a burden. Saying “I will run a mile this evening” is much more motivating and allows you to prove exactly who you are and what you can do.

 

Anything is possible when you have a path, a plan, and a desire to take action. Dean Graziosi

 

3. Don’t Worry About the Acceptance of Others

It seems all too natural to worry about what other people think of us. Social media can make things even worse. If you find yourself constantly “looking for likes” or some kind of validation from friends, family, or even strangers, you are looking at your self-worth in the wrong place by looking through someone else’s lens and standards.

It can be hard to give up this habit. Everyone wants to be accepted. But, you won’t find what you are worth in the opinions of others. You have the power to see yourself for how great you really are. When you are able to internalize this power and recognize your true value and self-worth, you won’t put so much emphasis on what others think of you. You will get to know who you are, what you are really worth, and you can be confident in that.

4. Let Yourself Off The Hook

Many times, people cannot see their true self-worth because they are holding on to past guilt. Almost everyone has regrets. Whether you did something when you were young that you should not have, or perhaps you wronged someone in some way, the past is the past.

You need to learn to forgive yourself and let yourself off the hook. By holding onto that guilt, you will never be able to see what you are really worth. It will feel like a ball and chain holding you back. But, you have the key to break free, if you just give yourself the chance. If you would be willing to show someone else forgiveness and acceptance for their wrongdoings, you owe it to yourself to do the same. Give yourself a break.

5. Look at Your Gifts

If you are still having a hard time understanding your self-worth, take a look at your natural skills. Everyone has certain gifts in life. Your talents are going to be different from someone else’s – that’s what makes the world work!

Think about a few things that you are really good at. Or, something that you really enjoy doing. Go even further by creating a list of your talents and skills. They don’t need to be huge. In fact, writing a list of several “little things” can make you see just how important and valuable that you are. Take a look at that list whenever you are feeling down or devalued, and practice those talents and skills as often as possible.

By keeping these skills and talents of yours in mind, you can start to celebrate your self-worth. When you have a better understanding of your real value, you are more likely to prioritize other things like self-care, self-esteem and self belief. Each of which are different, but they are all connected in some way. But, it starts with knowing your self-worth. And, chances are, it is much more than you might think.

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